By Jane McNamara, Elder Law Attorney 

Everyone, especially seniors, should look at life realistically.  Things don’t stay the same—good health and independence are not guaranteed.  Health crises arise.  Disability happens.  However, most people never think that it will happen to them.  Many are leading busy, productive lives before some unexpected life altering event occurs.  An event that takes away one’s independence and requires someone else to make one’s health care decisions, pay bills, deal with financial institutions, and handle the business of everyday life.

So, what if this happens to you? Do you have a plan in place?  If so, has it been updated within the last five years to reflect the current HIPAA laws and tax laws? Or, are you someone without a plan? Something unforeseen happens and you are not prepared.  Now, you are subject to costly court proceedings with no control over important life decisions or issues.

Some people believe “planning” simply means putting their adult son or daughter on the bank accounts—“just in case”.  Suddenly, mom or dad’s nest egg becomes the adult child’s pot of gold.  For example, dad has dementia or a stroke and the adult child, who was unable to manage his or her own finances, now has unlimited access to dad’s funds as a “joint” owner.  The adult child is eager to pay off his or her personal debts and fulfill his or her sense of entitlement, using the parents’ funds.  Further, if the adult child is sued for that nasty car accident—the parent’s “joint” account is now in jeopardy. 

Since the parent has not planned in advance or set up controls for incapacity, he or she is now at the mercy of the adult child.  The parent has failed to choose responsible agents, establish specific guidance and controls, or put legal authority in writing.  In addition, the parent has not discussed alternatives to nursing homes or independence options in senior communities.  The adult child is unaware of local programs or facilities in the community.  Rather, the parent must live in the adult child’s home.  The adult child, not the parent, makes this decision.  Isolation, depression and complete dependence on the adult child often result. Money evaporates. It is used for the adult child’s benefit instead of being used for a parent’s benefit.

Advanced decision making is essential to quality of life and independence at any age. What is your choice?